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Chris Hansen
Chris Hansen(クリス・ハンセンKurisu hansen) is possibly the best pedo buster ever. He single handly brought down Pedobear's loli army using a few sneaky treaks. His ability to teleport and turn invisible make him damn near impossible to defeat. He is the guardian of all lolis and shotas across the world, protecting them from child molesters all across the globe. Past Chris Hansen first started his pedo busting buisness when he noticed a local ice cream truck was making all the little boys and girls missing for some reason. He followed the truck in his sleek black car until the truck reached a shady looking house in the middle of Fucking Nowhere. He teleported behind the weird old man that jumped out of the truck, look the kidnapped children and said: "Nothing Personal, Kids", beore breaking the old geezer's neck. Chris hijacked the car returned all the little kids to their mothers and fathers, except the orphans, in which he just sent them to be grinded into meat for Wendy's hamburgers. Never frozen, always fresh! For the next few months, Chris was able to defeat many pedophiles with his extreme skillz. During this period, he changed his catchphrase from 'Nothing Personal Kids" to "Why don't you take a seat right over there?", in order to promot his new show "To Catch A Predator" in hopes that the pedos would watch the show in Hell. They never do, though, because Hell's TV signal is absolute garbage, just like most things there. Many new outets praised him for rescuing all the children, but they would always say his methods were pedophobic. Everything was going peachy, until Pedobear attacked. He was sick of all the slaughtering of his fellow pedophile and had amassed an enormous loli army. But Chris had something up his sleeve. He knew exactly how to get little girls on his side. He tossed an assload of candy and my little ponies into the crowd, and the lolis soon went nuts. Chirs Hansen was about to give the finishing blow on Pedobear, but Pedobear did one thing no other pedophile did when Mr.Hansen was around: he GTFO'd outta there on his Pedomoblie (also known as the popemoblie). From that day forward, Chris Hansen has been on the hunt for Pedobear. Powers Chris Hansen has an extensive array of skills used to defeat pedos. He has the amazing power to teleport behind people, making him the perferct pedo-assassin. Along with that, he can turn invisible, and he turn really invisble, unlike that pussy Cursed-kun. Chris Hansen is also the only human completely invulnerable to the effects of Sacred Hentai, proven by the many times it has been used as a bribe, and has never worked. His True Motives It has been suggested that Chris Hansen is actually a pedophile and this whole thing is a trap (No, not that kind) . Some researchers claim that he is killing all these pedophiles and child molesters so he can have all the loli pussy to himself. However, Chris also kills pedophiles that don't molest kids or look at Cheese Pizza, and he also kills people he thinks look like pedos\child molesters, and child child molesters. He also kills Lolis that are thots, and he kills really annoying kids, so this theory is kinda shaky Category:Good Guys Category:Not Gay Category:Stuff that´ll send you to jail Category:Minor Characters Category:Human Category:Characters Category:La Ribellione Finale